wanting everything but never the easy way

[this poem contains adult content]

a thousand breaths, still only exhaust
each foot planted, lost
a moon still rises
a moon still rises

she thought it was her own truth
she found it among the salt flats of Utah
with soft lips and open eyes on an aluminum bus
nothing but the promise before her
of digging the past beneath growing trees

what is it to destroy a family?
she wonders, sometimes, being fucked

a baby in each arm and strolling the grocery store
picking out the brands of her own childhood
the wheel on the cart stuck and it jingles

in her car down the street beneath halogen lamps
she waits and cannot breathe, naming constellations
after the mistakes she has made
three houses down a hysterical women rushed out the door
blue eye and a limp leg, her emotions manifested
our protagonist knows she cannot bury this

she had aspirations
always her mom had cats, and unlike
the rest of their
the cats were taken care of
cats never have dreams or aspirations
if taken care of

and the fox outside the window
its face appearing between the frosted edges


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